Another Dreary Day

MON., JAN. 18, 1999, 1:44 PM
JARED’S ROOM, BEN LOMOND

The rain comes down, gently but steadily, another dreary, sodden day after the service and burial of your son, Michael. The gathered clan is dispersing, some of whom, you realize, you may not see again. You feel fine, but you also realize that your time in the earth is limited, and so it becomes important to use time “wisely”… which, from My perspective, is not completely the same as for your dominant culture. This that We do together here is vital to your continued growth, for I do not want you to live your last years less “connected” with Me and the spiritual dimension of your self.

In some ways this is a beautiful place, but it was not yet “finished”, and it does require upkeep. Its beauty and charm are different from your home Farm place, and while you appreciate this place it does not measure up to yours. You have been away for… well, it seems (1:55 / 1:56) almost too long. This was a necessary, important “trip”, but now the “occasion” is past, and it’s time to return to your life, in the more familiar setting. It is not really pleasant, being here on another dreary day.

When you return you must give some time for contemplation of your life and also that of your family, immediate. What should be planned, executed, and completed as vital portions of your ongoing life. This current “event” should press you to clarify your thoughts and conclusions about what you want, should this transition be yours to experience, in a few years. You know, certainly, that it is not “morbid” to make some current decisions about this time of transition, even as you may change some aspects later. (See where you are now, and on this I will then comment.)

It would be a “gift” to Wendy and the rest of the family for you to “flesh out” the notes you made on Michael’s life, as you experienced it, with him… and the others close to him. I’m not demanding this, but you do have some notes, and it could be a valuable kind of “closing”. Life does go on, but written remembrances help to bolster and retain personal memories… of an outstanding son.

The experience of these days here has been a good and worthwhile one, with some feelings of discomfort. These, however, were not of the expected sort – sadness and tears for the one who was “too young and too vital” to die at 43. Your discomfort (slight) came from knowing, through My Teachings to you, that Michael needed only a brief “rest” or “sleep”, and that his spiritual growth continues, in some appropriate form for his spirit now. Oh, of course this “knowing” was not the source of the discomfort, but, rather, that of communicating it to others, some of whom were in what seemed like a more appropriate time of grieving. You felt more like smiling and celebrating, but this seemed “wrong”. To thine own self be true? I tell you that life here in the earth is different combinations of the rational and the mystical. Many people with whom you come in contact don’t have the same, comfortable perceptions of and experiences with the mystical. It thus seems as though you have no (or at least insufficient) feeling for the loss of this son… or are some spiritual weirdo… or are denying the reality of death (or, better, DEATH!) This all encourages discomfort, but accept it, rather than giving up the vision I have bequeathed to you.

Yes, I do have some compassion for humans, including, strangely, some “good Christians”, who lament all deaths… and celebrate all births. It is such compassion that slows My causing and allowing some increase in deaths… and in the rate of deaths. Yet it must come, for I don’t want the collapse of this unique way in which lives can be lived… and spirit enhanced. Instead of “every man’s death diminishes me” (which was once more fully relevant than it is now) it shall come to be “every person’s death enhances me, for it helps restore a balance that is sustainable” (a bit long, but… better!)