Another “Imperfection”
THURS., APR. 7, 1994, 5:39 AM
FARM, STUDY
Your focus, of late, has been on the imperfection of your right foot, caused, presumably, by an imperfection in your back. You have strange, unique pain and, of course, the toes don’t function, and some of the leg’s strength is gone. You do not have the spiritual commitment to the natural process of healing that you have experienced on two earlier occasions. You have “gone medical,” with the advantages and disadvantages of this complex “system.”
Now you have choices, each with possible benefits and also some “costs.” You would like to function fully again in your walking, certainly, and being able to run… a nice bonus. But surgery? By whom? Where? What technique? You seem to have mostly possibilities, with some probabilities, at best. It would be difficult to accept your present condition as normal for the future… and yet you are functioning quite well, in the ways that are of most concern to Me. You shall pray for guidance, and I shall give some, but you, and Lenore, must choose what seems best and then take the consequences. No single decision and course of action is “the one,” with all others being clearly worse.
Then yesterday, on that 42nd remembrance of your marriage to Lenore, the one I intended for you, and you for her, came preliminary news of another “imperfection” – cancer in your prostate. You shall hear a more complete medical judgment today, with, again, some alternatives presented. Some will seem very invasive, and you ponder the total consequences of these. They may prolong your earth life, this time, but also may adversely affect your functioning as a total person. The challenge is clearly a spiritual one.
If you elect to be operated upon, to have chemotherapy or to have radiation… or all… then you MUST see this FULLY as a spiritual challenge. Your spirit must overcome the “insults” that accompany these means of killing cancer. These are war-like strategies, and, as in war, a victory is rarely possible without harm, even much harm, to the innocent. Even with precise techniques some of your good, functional cells will be killed or wounded, and your body will try to protect itself from this invasive force, however noble its intent. You will then have to hope that many of your natural adaptive powers will be weak and ineffective. Ah, Me, what a disquieting thought for one committed to positive health.
Thus far you have seen these medical diagnostic techniques as spiritual challenges, and you have come through them without spiritual loss. But the challenges that lie ahead, with almost all of your possible choices, loom much larger. You have not thought of yourself as a “patient,” being “done to,” because your body has developed defects. One at a time would be tolerable. You now have two competing imperfections, each with alternatives that could resort function and prolong physical life, with each alternative having side effects, as your body, mind, and spirit strive to maintain and restore your essential wholeness.
One alternative, for each imperfection, would be to refuse medical treatment of any kind, letting your body fight its own battles with deterioration. From the medical viewpoint this is the least desirable course and would not be recommended. Hence, I do speak to it. The walk you can manage with your “damaged” foot is not a pleasant one, but it is functional. With a few exceptions the pain is tolerable. It could get worse, of course, but then surgery may be only a temporary respite, with all of its costs.
With cancer, doing nothing may allow the cancer to grow and spread, with an end to earth life sooner than expected, in probable pain. Or doing nothing may allow the body’s own healing capacities to function toward the cancer and not toward “the invasions.” You can never know what capacities you have unless these are given a good, fair test. But this risks failure and insufficiency.
Never forget My “bottom line,” however. The spirit that is the essence of you cannot be killed by cancer. Life is continuous. Stepping from one realm into another is not difficult. You can “lose” only if you succumb to fear and mistrust.
Selah.
6:53 AM
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