Home Alone
SAT., OCT. 10, 1998, 12:35 PM
FARM, DECK
Your life partner and help-mate is gone on a visit to the state of her birth and childhood… to be with her sisters and brother. This leaves you here to care for this place and, even, be a “substitute landlord”, a not-too-happy prospect. As I said in a Teaching earlier this week (and this is #4… good!) you have no pressing responsibilities, but you do have a “host” of tasks that should be commenced… and completed. You did well by the list you made, but you decided against one for today. (Note that you haven’t accomplished much… an observation, not a criticism.)
You miss Lenore, but there also is some value in this “home alone” experience. You think of many things you could do, with this “freedom”, and these are interesting thoughts, but it is unlikely that you’ll deviate much from “what is usual”. You’re seeking the best balance between leisure (or is it laziness?!) and accomplishment. Accomplishment is not as vital now as in earlier years, but there still needs to be “some”.
Reading about medical care, now and in the future you are aware of all of the doctors you saw in relation to this “left hand syndrome”. Much of it was paid for by insurance, but not all, and you are bothered by what you must pay… for nothing… in relation to the health of your hand. The lesson is: be less willing to “go medical”… your body can make the adaptations necessary, or it can’t. There will be a time to “move on”, and I’m sure you’ll be aware of it, when it comes.
I have mixed reactions to medical care, as I see it practiced in your culture. There are some benefits, and some lives that are saved are then lived on in real service to one’s fellow humans and to Me. But I also see many lives that are prolonged, but concerns are only for self and for one’s own needs. Some of these are good folks, originally, and they are not pleased with themselves, when they finally do “come on over”. There just should be more preparation for the proper end to an earth life… less of the perception that “this is all there is”. I guess this is just one of those “imperfections” in a perfect world… for which I’m responsible.
As you look out over this landscape, on a perfect Fall day, it doesn’t seem likely that much is going on, around the world, which causes anguish and suffering. Food is not available for some. The coming Winter weather shall increase suffering. Some are in anguish because stock prices have gone down, and they have “lost money” (which is often quite theoretical), making them less rich than “before”. Emotional problems increase as living conditions worsen, for several reasons.
And here you are, sitting on the deck built by your sons in appreciation for their lives, home alone, with sunshine… and a choice of easy, worthwhile tasks. If your financial condition continues healthy, you can thank Me, even if I am not completely responsible. And if you do suffer some as the economy falters, in concert with this Y2K fiasco, appreciate that, too, as just a bit of what many humans experience. And maybe it won’t be necessary.
Being home alone is an experience to savor for its “worth”, but also one that reminds you of the fuller life you have with Lenore, how good it is to have a family… and a church congregation (whom you’ll get to greet tomorrow!) and, still, some friends at the University. When there is a good balance, each, aloneness and togetherness, abets the other. Appreciate each, in “its season.”
I must “bug you” again about letter-writing, of the personal sort. Our Ruminations does give some picture of your life to readers, but there are some who need the personal epistle. You need to reestablish this as an ongoing, valuable part of your life, for letters do encourage some in return.
SAT., OCT. 10, 1998, 12:35 PM
FARM, DECK
Your life partner and help-mate is gone on a visit to the state of her birth and childhood… to be with her sisters and brother. This leaves you here to care for this place and, even, be a “substitute landlord”, a not-too-happy prospect. As I said in a Teaching earlier this week (and this is #4… good!) you have no pressing responsibilities, but you do have a “host” of tasks that should be commenced… and completed. You did well by the list you made, but you decided against . . .
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