Howzit Going?

TUES., SEPT. 5, 2000, 12:45 PM
OFFICE, PULLIAM

Almost suddenly the weather has changed, and you are feeling the cool of Fall. Oh, it’s just the beginning, and there will be more hot times, but the “break” has been “made” and recognized.

If you still had been an active professor you would have at least 3 classes, would have met each several times, and would know most of their names by now. You would be doing all of that, would have several responsibilities at the Church, and would have all of the “present chores” on the home-Farm place. Yes, you used to do that, with not much more frustration than you feel now, with the few tasks that still are yours to fulfill.

You obviously are sitting down with this familiar pad and pen and writing what you “hear,” in your spirit, from Me, your friendly Holy Spirit. This afternoon you will get a start on this summer’s Ruminations, and, just perhaps, it’ll be printed by early next week. Then you’ll turn the notes that you have into the article for Yvonne, and then…

The pressures you’re feeling (which, you’ll have to admit, are puny compared to those of earlier years) mostly come from yourself, a “remnant” of your “treatment” of yourself in your active career. You pushed yourself, but mostly in appropriate directions and for proper causes. You’re at a “stage” now in your retirement wherein you still push yourself to be active and to accomplish, creditably, AND… at the same time… are asking yourself, “Why do this?” “You don’t really need to do this, do you?”

I’ll simply say this is an expected stage in your transition. You can’t chuck those at least semi-disciplined years, but neither can you accomplish as you did, in the “time frames of yesteryear.” You know this, but you need some reinforcement from Me.

You notice, also, that the Farm chores also take longer and the motivations to do all that you should are weaker and fewer. I still say to you that maintaining the health and beauty of that place is one of your on-going tasks… and one purpose of this is the exercise to maintain your health. Oh, sure, you’re a dying man, but you’ll be happier in the life you will be given to live if you continue to make/let you body do what it can. You have such motivations and convictions, but hear Me say the same.

Both of your “trips” this past summer were enjoyable, and you’re glad you did them both. But you and I have agreed that your times of visiting “somewhere else” should be diminishing. Yesterday’s visit by Lynda and John was a preview of how the future “should be” – people coming to visit you. You calculate that your parents were about your age when they visited you here for the last time. And after they moved to Hawaii it was clear that they were to be the “visitees,” not the visitors. You just hope that there will be some who will want to visit you.

It is bothersome to have just enough aches and pains in the night to make sleep difficult. You are approaching this “problem” in a good way. Do what you need to to go to sleep… like in the chair… and return there if aches return. There is little point in trying to discover, medically, WHY you are having these experiences. Experiment a bit, but also just accept this as a relatively low pain problem.

Your Church-life seems to be “on hold” now, and, after this month of ushering, you could enjoy some Sunday mornings with other congregations, those We’ve agreed are ones “good for you. You realize, of course, that you are most truly members of the Church of Jesus Christ – Presbyterian, Methodist, Congregational… at least. If you take Me up on this you’ll have to decide how to allocate your “contributions.” (If you are “more than a visitor” you should give more than a token.)