Parenting

APR. 5, 1981, 6:00 AM
W. WILLOW, STUDY

One of the important parts of your being for over twenty seven years now has been that of a parent. And you talked of parenting with Karin last evening. Having complained from time to time that I, as Jesus, did not present a sufficient model for parenting, listen now, o son, as I share some of My thoughts and observations on this theme.

The role of parent is obviously necessary, for young humans cannot be expected to find the best way to adulthood without some guidance and help. The culture in which you live has, as part of material progress, lengthened the time of dependence and encouraged the desire for more material possessions than it is healthy to desire. This means that the time of parenting is increased for each son or daughter, and the task of countering the culture to some extent is made more difficult. Now, of course, some parents are an active part of the culture that encourages the desire of material things, but those of you who are Christian should never be able to do this with comfort. Luxuries can never be justified until the needs of the poor, suffering, sick, and homeless are met. And, practically speaking, that shall never be. Thus, the Christian who is a parent must constantly counter some very powerful forces in the culture, and most of youth naturally resent this.

Because of this factor parenting is easiest in cultures where goods and services are minimal, where there are not great differences in income and wealth, and where expectations and desires are relatively low. So, you can see that you have elected to be a parent in a most difficult culture. It is one of the expected challenges of your life as Bob Russell.

The most important positive task in being a parent is guiding each child to a knowledge of and an acceptance of Me as Lord and Master of Life. But obviously this is not a task that can be done directly… most of the time. The most basic road to fulfillment is your own personal model… and a consistency in both parents. An obvious part of this is active participation in My Body, the Church, with some constancy in the assertion that this is for spiritual reasons, not social conformity or prestige. Thus, the statement, “we’re going to church… or to a church supper… or a church meeting…” is a modeling one, but is not complete without some assurance that it is in service and gratitude to God, not as a difficult obligation or as just another social club.

It is an important judgment when to cease compelling a child to go with you. It is good to feel that a child can be “conditioned” to want to remain part of the Body, but it is important to recognize that this also encourages belonging for the wrong reasons. I want people, young and old, in My Body because of love for and commitment to Me… and to others in My Name… rather than just “Well, I grew up in the church…”