Retirement!

TUES., JULY 31, 2001, 1:24 PM
FARM, STUDY

It is a hot, summer day. Your desk is reasonably clean, and you have a new, quite acceptable pen for this and some other upcoming Teachings from Me, your friendly Holy Spirit. (As in the past this pen is to be used only for these Teachings… but you’re quite aware of Our “traditions.”)

You have been retired, now, officially, for four years, but, as We planned, it was not to be a sudden, sharp move away from the life you had been leading. There were no more scheduled classes, but you still had some involvement with your Department. You had responsibilities at the Church, to which you could now devote more time and attention.

But now… you are feeling “more retired,” and you have no continuing “outside” responsibilities. You haven’t yet set any clear pattern for life, other than worship and fellowship at the Church on Sunday morning and Bible Study on Thursdays. Your feet are healing, but slowly, and you can manage the chores here… though neither you nor I are satisfied with the cutting of your extensive lawn. Your garden can’t be called a success, with a few small tomatoes, but, yes, there are super weeds that can be harvested for the rabbits and chickens.

You have “vowed” to keep this desk from becoming cluttered, but you haven’t been successful with this small, overflowing table to your left. See what you can accomplish this week, even with the heat, in “neatening” this Study. (For, among other things, it is Our Primary Place of “meeting”)

You’ve made some progress with the balancing of your check book and your bank statements, but the balances still don’t match. You await the July statement from the C.U., and, with it in hand, you MUST get this aspect of your life in order again. I realize that you are frustrated by it, but you’ll have to do it. Oh, you’re right in feeling no extreme urgency because there seems to be plenty of money in the accounts, but you have managed this “balancing” through many years of married family life, and you can’t let it “beat you” at this age.

As you looked over that volume of Teachings from 10 years ago you noted three trips “away,” for professional and spiritual “reasons.” Now you feel no need to travel away from this Place, for personal or any of these other reasons. Some, even many, would feel that retirement is a time to travel, to visit friends and kin and to visit and revisit places. Such feelings are not enticing to you… are, more and more, overcome by needs to really retire. You have a fine place here. Need you go elsewhere?

You have some thoughts about going to Hawaii next June for the 50th reunion of the Class of 1952, a special one for you, early in your career. But you also have thoughts of “been there, done that.” It may be time to leave that aspect of your life behind, for more than just your “elderliness.”

You are fortunate in having two sons (one with a big family) living here, close. The other two families are far away, each on opposite coasts. Times together in the past have been fun and rewarding. Perhaps such shall be no more, unless they come to visit you.

Life as a “genuine retiree” seems satisfying, though your “active life” is still so close that you feel some guilt about withdrawing from what “has been.” Relax and enjoy this time. Cancer is not yet killing you, nor is your erratic heart rhythm. You have a Ruminations to finish, but I’ll not press you on that. If you feel the urge, know that I approve, but don’t feel harassed because you seem to be retiring from that “good thing” also.