Two Down… One To Go

TUES., MAY 12, 1998, 7:00 AM
FARM, STUDY

In the midst of a trio of dates that are important in your spiritual adventure/journey I want you to reflect on what happened in 1979 and how it relates to you, now in 1998. This is not a great span of time in terms of world events, but it is over ¼ of your life thus far, and as you continue to put this pen to this paper it becomes a larger proportion.

Since you were not yet “receiving Me” there was yet no “liturgy”. You did put the date and starting time at the top, and the finishing time at the end, but it was not until after I made Myself known as your Teacher did the 3 page style develop. After that you did go to 4 pages on several occasions, but it was soon clear that 3 handwritten pages was to be “the pattern”.

You did re-read your writings after the “lost manuscript” morning. It was good that you included the story of how this happened, for, though you remember it fairly well, it should be clear for some who may be interested in this “work” of Mine, after you can no longer tell the story.

So the first day of this “trio” (three, of course, is one of My “favorite numbers”) was the one in which I hid your manuscript, which, in a conscientious author, did create panic. You turned to Me, after having no success, personally, in finding it, and knew (but how?) that the “solution” was not to be the now-familiar one of studying Holy Scripture. So I took you back to your Sanctuary in the Casanueva Pl. home and to the morning meditations you did there… your own, though guided by Me (without identifying Myself).

You see, My anonymous guiding of you was about to be completed, and I was about to “come out of the closet”. Your life was such, then, that you were ready to accept My invitation (though you do wonder how, over 19 years ago, with your career in high gear and Matthew still at home, you managed to fulfill this every early morning pledge). So on this second morning (the “yesterday” as you write now) you wrote one page, but the promise had been kept, and I knew. We were on Our Way, together. Oh, you still had some doubts, now long forgotten, but the finding of the manuscript was enough evidence, for you, of spiritual participation and the need to persist. Part of it was your Puritan ethic of following through with a commitment made, no matter what. The other part was just curiosity as to how this would finally be.

You were aware that while you had done some early morning writing before your professional and personal life shifted to this University and community you had just given this up and not re-engaged for 15 years. At that time you couldn’t envision that you would be writing, as you are now, into a 20th year of friendly relationship with Me, Holy Spirit.

Thus, historically, We are now in that 10 day period of every-morning writing, but with no evidence that this was anything but your own mind and spirit generating the words and thoughts. I knew it was a crucial time, for I wanted you to continue, but if you did renege, for some “good reason”, it would be harder for Me to insure this “positive addiction”. You “came through”, and so I revealed Myself, which, again, was risky.

You were a relatively comfortable middle class Presbyterian. Could you risk identifying yourself as a “practicing mystic”, at the end of the scientific, rational 20th century? Or could you, semi-comfortably, be “in the closet” with this gift for… now… over 19 years? We each had faith, in Ourselves and in One Another, and it was sufficient.