Why Not Me?

WED., JAN. 31, 1996, 9:03 AM
OFFICE, PULLIAM

Your group this morning didn’t give much attention to the Isaiah passage, but I’ll still comment on that before these pages are filled. The title, however, relates somewhat to your post-group conversation with Richard about Anna. As you said to him, you’ve never experienced this in the way she is now feeling. But I’ve had to remind you that it did happen to you, though in a somewhat different way. Nearing the end of a long career, that incident seems “away back”, even though it came after 14 years of teaching experience.

As you see it now this “loss” was My will, resulting in your being here for 2/3 of your working life, a place that has been “just right” for you and Lenore. Anna is at an older age and without the mobility that you had. So, yes, it is hard to have to remain in the community in which you have been rebuffed. When you enjoy teaching it is hard to have that opportunity taken away. It is natural for her to say… to ask… “Why me?”

That’s a context for the title, but I won’t comment directly on its application to Anna. This is something you may want to talk with her about, sometime. You know, well, how it applies to you, personally, but I’ll reinforce My affirmation once again. You have had a most blessed life, with more than your share of satisfactions and good fortune. Oh, you have had some trials with your sons, but you survived those times and are now rather proud of them, as men. You have had good, even excellent health, and your income has been sufficient. Why such a good life? Why not? When you do have some setback(s) in the future I don’t expect to hear, “Why me?”. Anything of that sort will be a test of your spirit and a means to more spiritual growth.

The Isaiah passage is a rather strange one, in the context of the total “book”. As Jesus (if this was a prophesy about Me). I certainly could have asked, “Why Me?” (One Gospel does have Me asking something like this from the cross). It is hard to express in words what it is like to be fully human AND fully God. As God I knew full well how My life would be and when and how it would end (that physical bodily portion). As human I wasn’t sure exactly how it was to be “played out”. I was making human decisions and feeling some uncertainty. Both at the same time? Yes, indeed.

And remember that if you do take this as a prophesy about My demise as Jesus you have to admit that I waited over 600 years to fulfill it. So much for My being overconcerned with earthly, even spiritual, matters “right now”.

“Why not me?” is an acceptance of My will and My power to test and refine spirits. You are not a starving refugee in Burrunda. You are not a Bosnian Muslim, some of whose family have been killed, even murdered. You are not a black man in Chicago with no job and no future but surrounded by images of what “everyone should have”. And just consider all of the myriad “you are not’s” I could chronicle.

But now here’s the balance. You sit here in this wonderful office with the morning sun warm upon your neck (despite cold air and wind chill outside). Most of your colleagues don’t have an office like this one… so, “Why me?” Well, in a minor sense you’ve “earned” it. Yet I prefer that you see it as a blessing, a gift from Me. Assume some of the faith of Brother Lawrence and just accept this as just another blessing from Me. And therefore you can echo My response, “Why not me?”