Yes, You “Messed Up”… Again

SAT., JULY 25, 1998, 10:46 AM
FARM, STUDY

Last evening started out wonderfully with the family gathered for fine food and fellowship. You drank more than you should have and you lost consciousness of yourself… you blacked out. As you well know, this is a sign of trouble, coming from beverages, alcoholic. You don’t remember what you said, and you revealed some past happenings in your family’s life that had been kept secret. You can’t “undo” what was done and said. It is a potential lesson, and I shall help you make the best of it. Be just as receptive to chastisement as you are to praise. I certainly can offer both… in season.

You have generally enjoyed the drinking of alcoholic beverages and the feelings that have come as a result. Oh, you have “messed up” several times in the past, and, generally, have then been abstinent and then more moderate for some time following. You shall do so again because of this evening’s excess, with the hope that it shall not happen again.

Still, you are aware that this may be a tendency that you have, for several reasons, and it won’t be easy to control, consistently. Thus you’ll have to decide whether the pleasures that you associate with drinking are sufficient to run the risk that builds as you feel confident about your control. I can advise you to be abstinent as the safest way, but I am not against fun, so I am not as “one way” as many of My servants assume I am… on this issue.

Drinking ceases to be fun when you lose control, as you did last evening. You know this, of course, but when you lose your inhibitions these are part of control… and there is some “strange pleasure” in being less inhibited. So, yes, it is (11:21 / 11:24) both fun and not-fun… as are some other life happenings. Earth life is full of such not-so-easy choices.

Lenore is the love of your life, and you would never consciously or purposely hurt her. But you did, in your blackout condition, and that shall be difficult to forget. She may forgive you, because one “mess-up” doesn’t negate years of love and comradeship, but it will be hard for her to forget. It shall have to be slowly countered by acts of love, diverse acts.

This Teaching is coming along more slowly than most others. You are hearing Me, but you are then giving in to thinking about what I say and mixing these thoughts with Mine, which you normally resist easily. Your spirit still wants to have these written words, thoughts, and ideas Mine, and so the struggle goes on… which takes time.

You feel yourself beginning to “disengage” from life as it has been. You don’t feel “hung-over”, but you feel a “sadness” about life that is not normal for you. You feel some “responsibility” as a born-again Christian, with this special relationship with Me, Holy Spirit, to live life without any such “mess-ups” as this one, of which We speak. When such do occur it makes you wonder if this earth life of yours has been “too long”. You have some present empathy for how your Dad feels about life… very little enthusiasm.

You have some present feeling that if what you say and do are not going to be helpful to others… and can be harmful… then it is better to disengage and not run such risks. You have always had some of the feeling that “if you can’t do something well, don’t do it”. You have to make such judgments in life, but it can also prevent you from “coming back to try again”.